Episode 84: Class of 2024 - Ammir, BSc Computer Science

Ammir Barakat speaks on the surrealness of graduating, being independent, and how he plans on navigating a whole new way of living with his move to London. Following his internship with a financial firm, Ammir looks forward working in finance full-time. 

Multi Story Edinburgh is a student-produced podcast that features snapshots of life as a new graduate. Each episode features a different path and a different story. In this season Matt speaks to five recent graduates from the Class of 2024 about the ins and outs of post-graduation life.

Multi Story Edinburgh has been created and produced by the Alumni Relations team at the University of Edinburgh. If you are interested in telling your story, please get in touch and let’s talk!

All opinions expressed are those of the individual and do not necessarily reflect those of the University of Edinburgh.

Music
Detective Begining Adventures by KonovalovMusic. Sourced from Tribe of Noise.

Transcript

[Theme music]

Matt  00:05

So people often say that university years are the best years of your life. Would you agree with that?

Ammir  00:13

I hope not, because I don't want it to all go downhill from here.

Matt  00:16

Exactly feels a bit inherently wrong.

Ammir  00:18

Yeah, I'm too young for this to be the best of my life. Yeah, don't get me wrong. It was amazing. It was really good, but my hope is it's going to be even better in the future.

[Theme music]

Matt  00:31

I'm Matt O'Malley, your host for season six of Multi Story Edinburgh, a podcast which tells the stories of our recent graduates as they begin to navigate life post-graduation. These are really unique and insightful conversations for those who are going through, or anticipating, the plunge that is graduating. So, whatever your path may be, however sure or unsure you are about your next steps, this is the place for you, and today we speak to Ammir.

Ammir  01:00 

I'm Ammir. I'm 25 years old. I'm originally from Damascus. I study Computer Science. I studied Computer Science. I'm still used to the present tense, and I'm moving down to London soon in September.

Matt  01:15

Is it jubilation, especially around the ceremonies? Do you think that was your peak feeling of university life getting that scroll? What was it like?

Ammir  01:23

Right now, it feels a bit more surreal. Bittersweet perhaps. It doesn't feel like it's over, especially considering that I'm up in Edinburgh daily, that I'm going to the university campus that I still study in Appleton tower. So, it doesn't feel real yet. But I think once, once I'm in my grad job, once I've left Edinburgh permanently, that's when it will really hit me, the entire journey that I've been through.

Matt  01:25

And do you think that's your friends who have also graduated? They're feeling kind of the same thing, a bit? It's a bit surreal?

Ammir  01:55

I think so. I think also, when you still have friends who are still at uni, you kind of feel like you're still at uni yourself.

Matt  02:03

So your uni friends?

Ammir  02:04

Yeah. So I think once all of my friend groups have graduated and we've all moved on to our professional adult life, you know, the nine to five, all of that, that's when it really hits you that you're not a student anymore.

Matt  02:16

Yeah, so moving to London for your for a graduate job, right? Yes, indeed. So, I guess it helps to get yourself out of this surreal moment by physically leaving Edinburgh, I suppose?

Ammir  02:31

Yeah, yeah, and just being forced to, you know, wake up a certain time every morning. I think that's definitely one of the things that I struggled with in uni, is the - I always tell prospective students this, that you have so much responsibility and so much freedom, and it can be a double-edged sword, because there's no one to actually make sure you're turning up to things. But that also means, let's say you've got a job interview, you've got something else, it's fine not to turn up to things for that purpose. But on the other hand, you can just get a bit disconnected from the from the academic train. It's not going to wait for you either, not going to stop lectures for you. No one to email you to say, 'Hey, why didn't you turn up to this lecture today?' So, I think having a more permanent job, where I know the hours are the same every day, I know the place is the same, I'm not, you know, bouncing between King's Buildings and central campus. I'm looking forward to that stability.

Matt  03:20

Yeah, so it's a completely different work pattern, almost - or you have to, yeah, the nine to five is different from maybe get up at nine, maybe finish at five. So that's, that's a transition, basically a big transition that all your fellow graduates are going to go through, or are going through. But we're going to go back to when you initially started in the university here, because that's also a transition, transitioning to the sort of independent work at university. Could you tell us what brought you to Edinburgh actually? What made you end up at Edinburgh University?

Ammir  03:56

Well, I live in Scotland originally, and doing computer science, Edinburgh is known for its capability in computer science, not only in Scotland and all the UK. So, take the research excellence framework that assesses how good universities are at their research. Edinburgh usually ranks number one in that.

Matt  04:14

It's very good.

Ammir  04:15

And I loved Edinburgh. I visited the city. I just fell in love with it. It's so different from every other city I've been to. It is very dualistic in nature, and I fell in love with that. Nature is really important to me, going hill walking, being around green areas. So I just knew I wanted to be in Edinburgh and not Glasgow. No disrespect, but it's not my thing.

Matt  04:35

That's completely fair enough. I think the city's a really big pull and the nature that goes with it. So, people often say that the university years are the best years of your life. Would you agree with that?

Ammir  04:48

I hope not, because I don't want it to all go downhill from here.

Matt  04:51

Exactly, feels a bit inherently wrong, doesn’t it?

Ammir  04:54

Yeah, I'm too young for this to be the best of my life. Don't get me wrong. It was amazing. It was really good. But, I hope it's going to be even better in the future. Yeah, I think it's definitely going to be less chaotic, perhaps, and the highs might be more pronounced, but more limited in their breadth, if that makes sense. In a way, being at university, I've done so many different things, and I've experienced so many different emotions. And I, like I said, I was on different committees. I interacted with very smart professors, with very smart students. I went through a lot of personal journeys, myself, dating, traveling, all of that. And I enjoyed having access to that breadth of different experiences, but I don't feel that I really investigated a specific immersion or a specific experience in depth. I think it's really good. I think university is a really good time to be able to explore around, but I wish that I had specialised a bit more. I think my adult life, post graduation life, rather, is an opportunity for me to hyper focus on perhaps one stream of life, yeah, and gain more experience in that one stream, perhaps do less of other things, but at least I'll be a bit more specialised in that one thing.

Matt  06:18

Yeah, depends, depends on the individual. Of course, it's extremely important to get those feelers out during the uni years, so you maybe you can find that route where you will want to specialise in as you have, as I understand. And you mentioned in one of your answers before, kind of the emotional roller coaster of it all. Or you experienced lots of different emotions and went through lots of different personal journeys? Yeah, I don't know whether you could tell us more about that? What was like the most challenging thing, maybe because there's lots of highs, but there's also challenges.

Ammir  06:51

That's a tough one, the most challenging thing. I think - let me think about it. You know, there have been a lot of challenging experiences, and what I still question, why I still ask myself is, Have I fully overcome those challenges, or have I just gone better at dealing with them as they rise along? I think being independent is very difficult and always has its moments of weakness, because I'm very - I'm on very good terms with my family, but I'm financially dependent from them, and I've been financially dependent from them for six, seven years now. I lived alone in Edinburgh, so first year, I moved into senior accommodation, but then when that ended, when Covid happened, all my flat mates left, and then since then, I've been living alone. And I have a tendency - maybe it's a bad tendency, but I have a tendency to take charge of things, things that I'm doing, and not usually ask for help. But there have been moments where you just feel like you're learning this journey, yeah, but they're not - they're not just those moments you feel, you get to experience the counterpart as well. Yeah, there have been a lot of moments as well where my friends have just surprised me and just supported me without me needing to ask for that, and I think it makes off of that.

Matt  08:06

Good that's really honest answer. Thank you for that. Yeah, uni is, especially Edinburgh, massive University - You get a student number, you might feel like a small fish sometimes, or just swimming up that river alone. Now you're looking into graduate life. Is it even bigger world? Any of those sort of feelings creeping back in, or is it just still surreal, as you said?

Ammir  08:28

Kind of it's not just about the graduate world. It's about heading back to London. I mean, the size difference. So it's just mind boggling. At the same time, I think there'll be so many opportunities for a more wholesome lifestyle, a more balanced lifestyle, and meet like-minded individuals who pursue that balance in their life - and I think I'll be able to set up support network you can, you know, establish that in London.

Matt  08:55

And do you notice things changing around, staying in contact with people now that everyone might be moving either to London or back home, wherever it may be, you know, does that seem like a challenge?

Ammir  09:09

Kind of and I did something where I made a list of the people who I want to be in contact with. I have a I'm known for my list. So, I always make a list of things to do. My friend sometimes makes fun of me for making an agenda when we meet up, I just decide on - yeah- what are we going to talk about? Are we going to discuss.

Matt  09:10

I'm going to try this out, I think.

Ammir  09:30

So I made a list of the people that I really appreciated knowing in Edinburgh, and I want to continue to be in touch with.

Matt  09:37

I think that's actually a really good idea, sort of gratitude list, but with like, people who are you actually grateful for? That's really cool. Tell me about your graduate job actually. I haven't actually asked?

Ammir  09:49

It's in finance. I wish there was more to say about that. It's a job in finance. It's for the same company I interned with last summer.

Matt  09:58

Nice.

Ammir  09:58

So I did an internship with them in their Edinburgh office, and now I'm going down to the London office. The people are lovely. They're really, really nice. It can kind of change my perception about the world of finance. Because a few years ago to go back to Ammir2022, if you had asked me if I would ever walk in finance, I would have just laughed at that thought. I was so aversive to it. It was not something that would have crossed my mind. But then I got into it, and then I realised that the people working there are not these money hungry, you know, evil people that the media might like to portray them as, and especially in the realm where I'm working, we just help out people with their life insurance, with their pension, with things like that. We manage their assets. So, we might help out, you know, a grandmother to retire well, to live her best life after retiring. So, I'm looking forward to it. I think especially being in London is going to be a bit different. But I really love the culture at this company.

Matt  10:55

Great, and you picked that culture up during your internship. Was that in your penultimate year? Yeah.

Ammir  11:00

So that was between the summer of third and fourth year - so last summer, this time.

Matt  11:05

Really turning back the clock now to little Ammir. Did Ammir have a dream job, or or anything like that?

Ammir  11:14

I did actually.

Matt  11:15

Was it pensions?

Ammir  11:16

No, it was not finance or pensions. It was the Mukhabarat. It's the Syrian Secret Intelligence Service. This was before the war started in Syria. But I, for some reason, when I was, I think, seven years old, I told my school teacher that I really want to join them. You know, obviously I've changed my mind since then - but I've always been interested in that world and politics, and in being able to influence the world around you, being from a country that has experienced war and that has had a leader, the same leader, for 40 years now, I've always been very, very interested in that domain. My uncle actually wrote an amazing book about the war, and I've pedaled it to a few of my friends in Edinburgh, I think I got five of my friends to read it in Edinburgh. You can actually find it in Appleton tower now, there's a bookshelf with the with a book there and the lighthouse bookshop, you can buy it from there as well.

Matt  12:12

Goodness me. What's the name of the book? You might as well peddle it now?

Ammir  12:14

It's called Burning Country, by Robin Yassin-Kassab. Such an interesting book,

Matt  12:22

Pretty unique position, or maybe not. We get people from all over the world, but a war torn country. I, myself am not. I'm from the UK, so it's like pretty big question, but how has that affected your studies, or anything like that?

Ammir  12:36

I don't really know if it did affect my studies. I was fortunate enough to live in a very rich area in Syria, in Damascus, when I lived there. And I mean, I know that to the average person here, the fact that I only experienced rockets and mortars is horrible, but to a person living in Syria who had actually been through real explosions and had their entire neighborhood destroyed. My experience was very easy going. I lived in a very well protected area. I I lived right next to the Ministry of Defense, so occasionally we would - they would have rockets launched at it, but it never really fazed me. I think my most difficult experience growing up with that country is being LGBT. And that kind of overshadowed the war. So I didn't really care much about the war, because my life before the war was still kind of difficult. And being here, like I said, I don't necessarily subscribe to a specific culture. I see myself as a 21st century man very calm, yeah, globalist, in a sense, and some people kind of, when they first meet me, they just always ask me about Damascus and about Syria and about the war. 'Would you ever go back? Would you do that?' When they get to know me a bit more, they learn that I don't really have, you know, loyalty to a certain place. I just, I very much believe in open borders and just us being all from the very same roots.

Matt  14:06

Brilliant, yeah, slightly nomadic, I guess, yeah.

[Theme music]

Matt  14:15 

Of course, I couldn't just let my graduates go without them telling me their favorite spots and things to do in Edinburgh?

Ammir  14:22

Hmm, tough question, only because there are so many things I love to do around Edinburgh.

Matt  14:27

We ask the hard questions.

Ammir  14:28 

One of my favorite things to do, and I know it sounds a bit rude at first, but there's a cemetery called Warriston Cemetery. It's this massive, intentionally abandoned cemetery, so they don't really cut the trees there or do anything, unless it's dangerous, of course, but other than that, they just let wildlife grow and thrive. So you can go there, and you can see so many cute little birds, squirrels, foxes. I remember the first time I ever snowed in Edinburgh, that's where I went, and I could tell that I was the first person there, because the snow was still fresh. It was just my footprints and the little paws of the foxes that were running and playing around in the winter in the snow.

Matt  15:05

Okay. Well, thank you very much.

Ammir  15:08

Thank you.

[Theme music]

Matt  16:19

So we've reached the end of this story, but fear not we have more to tell. To hear our other graduates from the class of 24 head to our website www.ed.ac.uk/alumni/new-graduates. Or just search Multi Story Edinburgh, wherever you get your podcasts. But for now, that's goodbye from me, and I'll catch you in our next story.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai